The Slowworm’s Song by Andrew Miller

‘Maggie – writing is no cure for insomnia, though it is, I suppose, a use for it ‘

Stephen Rose, an ex-soldier and recovering alcoholic, has been trying to avoid the past for a long time. And, after being absent for much of her life, Stephen is trying to build a relationship with his daughter, Maggie. But a letter, summoning him to an inquiry in Belfast about an incident during the Troubles, threatens his fragile sense of peace.

Stephen’s story, written as a letter to Maggie is both an attempt to buy time before responding to the letter and an account of his life, an attempt to explain his actions. Stephen is wracked with guilt, ashamed of the one incident in 1982 which he sees as defining his life. Alcohol provided him with a temporary refuge at the cost of his health and his relationship with Maggie’s mother.

Writing to Maggie is a form of catharsis, but the past is uncomfortable and full of ghosts.

‘Maggie, I know I’m labouring this but I want you to know I was once someone others could speak well of.’

We read of Stephen’s life, of how, as a young man with a Quaker upbringing he joined the Army. And then how things went horribly wrong. We learn, towards the end of the story of the incident, about which Stephen feels so guilty. And we wonder, until near the end, how his daughter will react.

As I read this novel, I felt pity for Stephen as well as for those affected by the incident.  People are complex, life is rarely straightforward, and all actions have consequences. I wondered how I would have lived my life if I was Stephen and how I would feel if I was his daughter Maggie. But mostly, I wondered about the people caught up in the Troubles.

This is the third of Mr Miller’s novels I have read, and I want to read them all.

‘These words are a river and they cannot be turned back.’

Jennifer Cameron-Smith